/ Kundalini Yoga
Reading Time: 9 minutes
Self-love is a buzzword that you hear often. But what does it truly mean? More than being the latest wellness trend, this act is about how you treat and think about yourself. Think about it: Do you show yourself the love and kindness that you deserve each day? Within this guide, we will explore what that means and how it will enhance your relationship.
Love Yourself so You Can Love Others
The cliche goes ‘You have to love yourself before you can love others’. While it may sound obvious, the truth is that many people simply do not love themselves or show themselves compassion. The modern world means we can fall into the trap of comparing ourselves to others on social media and drawing the incorrect conclusion that we fall short.
For many of us, the answer is no. We find ourselves in destructive patterns that make it almost impossible for us to love ourselves. When you’re in that state, the concept of loving someone else will seem impossible. You will come to the relationship with fear, guilt, pain, insecurity, and shame. None of these emotions make you a loving partner.
However, when you choose to start loving yourself as you should, you change the narrative. You can come to a relationship from a grounded, self-assured, happy place. All of the above means that you will be a good, caring, and healthy partner.
3 Ways to Enhance Your Self-Love
Ready to improve your self-love? The easiest way to start is to take small steps that could make a major difference. It’s not as challenging as you may first imagine and the rewards that you reap are worth the effort. Here are three ways you can get started now:
#1 Notice and Stop Negative Self-Talk
Negative self-talk is a common problem. You may be telling yourself stories that make you feel unhappy and worthless. For example, when you look in the mirror, you may tell yourself that you are ‘ugly’, ‘stupid’, or that you need to ‘lose weight’. All of these are signs of negative self-talk. You may not say them aloud but they have the same effect on you.
When you notice that you are thinking harmful things about yourself, the goal is to catch yourself and stop. You are in control of the story in your mind. Nobody else has that power. That means that you can change it. Rewrite your narrative to be a positive one.
#2 Treat Yourself like a Friend
Think about how you speak to your best friend. Let’s say that they come to you with a problem—how do you answer their needs? Since they are someone you care for deeply, you likely give them compassionate advice. Extend the same generosity to yourself. Whenever you face life’s difficulties, offer yourself the same care you would a friend.
#3 Give Yourself Time and Space
The modern world is busy and hectic. It can be hard to keep up with your work life, social life, and the countless commitments you have. However, you need to make some time for yourself. Whether that means meditating or engaging in some breathwork, this change could help you love yourself in a newfound way. Stop, breathe, and relax for a minute.
Self-love is the foundation of any romantic relationship. Taking the time to work on yourself before you partner up with someone new gives the relationship the best chance of success. Wherever you are in your personal journey, this is a beautiful step you can take.